


I Found My Heart In You

by LadyStarkWrites (readerofthestars)



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Angst, Break Up, F/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rating May Change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-13
Updated: 2017-04-06
Packaged: 2018-10-03 23:45:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,064
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10261751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/readerofthestars/pseuds/LadyStarkWrites
Summary: When Oraya Saruna left the Circle to join the Grey Wardens she knew she was off on an journey that would change her life forever. Now that she has gathered her army and put Alistair on the throne, Ferelden is ready to face the Blight. But what Oraya doesn’t realize is that her decision to make her lover King would have consequences she could never have imagined.





	1. Broken Hearts and Terrible Secrets

**Author's Note:**

> So this piece was born after I played an elf mage and romanced Alistair. The idiot that I am kept Alistair soft and the damn bastard broke up with my character. Needless to say I was not ready for that, however it has generated this ball of angst. I don’t know how long this is going to be but it will be sad and angsty, but eventually there should be a happy ending….I hope.

       

         She watched him leave. She wanted to call our after him, run to him and beg him to reconsider. They could figure this out. It did not have to be this way. But her legs seemed to be stuck to the floor like someone had cast winter’s grasp upon her. He turned down the hall and was gone, and Oraya was still standing frozen. He’d left. She loves him, she had given him everything and she thought he had given her everything in return.

 

            Apparently that hadn’t been true. How could he have left so easily if he had truly loved her? Oraya had never been close to anyone in the tower and never believed in love. Alistair had come in and changed that he made her feel special…made her feel amazing. He said he loved her despite being a mage and despite being an elf. He had taken that trust, that respect, that love she had given him and had shattered it.

 

            All at once that realization came crashing down around her and Oraya sucked in a ragged breath. Her legs, which had only felt frozen in place before, lost all stability. Scared that she would fall to the ground Oraya side stepped towards the dining room table and took hold of the edge for support, lest she completely collapse. Leaning over the wood she closed her eyes against the burning of the tears that she didn’t remember welling up.

 

            She hadn’t cried since her first year in the Circle. She had built a wall around her heart and soul and had survived in a place that tried to break her. Now Alistair had done what years in the Circle had never accomplished.

 

            How long she was standing there fighting the tears and swimming in her own thoughts Oraya didn’t know, but when she heard a voice it felt like she fell back into her body. “Oraya is that you making that noise? My gosh what’s happened.” Peeling her eyes open the elf watched Wynne walking into the room. It was then that she realized that she was making a high-pitched wheeze with every breath she took in. A warm hand came to rest on her shoulder and more tears spilled down her face. “Come now, I know things seem impossible but you have done so much. You can lead us through this.”

 

            The older mage’s words made a sob erupt from deep inside Oraya’s chest. Wynne had always taken the time to make sure she was all right, to make sure the weight of this Blight did not crush her. How could she explain this? How could she explain that it was Alistair leaving her after all the things they had faced, werewolves, warring kings, undead rising, was what caused her to fall apart.

 

            She shook her head and took in two gasping breaths before she could reply. “You were right Wynne…Alistair and I….could never…have.....ended well.” Each pause was interrupted by a sob and Oraya closed her eyes tight against the tears that she couldn’t even hope to stop.

 

            Wynne sighed deeply and Oraya felt the mages warm arms slide across her shoulder and gave her a tight squeeze. “Oh my dear,” Wynne’s voice was soft and Oraya felt her head fall to the other woman’s shoulders.

 

            “Please. Don’t say…I told you so.”

 

        Oraya felt Wynne shake her head and squeeze Oraya again. “Of course not dear. I did not think this would be the fate for both of you. I thought you would have beat the odds.”

 

Those words made Oraya shudder even harder. Standing here in the dining room of Arl Eamon’s estate, on the brink of a battle that would define the fate of Ferelden, and even Thedas, it was only Wynne’s arm that kept Oraya from flying apart.

 

* * *

 

 

Oraya stood in that dining room and each of the other companions seemed to come looking for her, over the next hour. Their reactions were interesting. Leliana and Wynne were the most comforting. Morrigan’s eyebrows here pinched together and she had a deep scowl on her face but she made no comment, which Oraya was grateful for. Sten was gruff and short with all of them, stating that this was not the time to fall apart. Zevran offered to kill Alistair and Oraya couldn’t even smile. Who surprised her most was Oghren. He took her hand gave it a squeeze and said “Love is hard. It will chew you up and spit you out. But you be stronger, and with your strength now, I don’t ever want to get in your sodden way.”

 

Things got too claustrophobic very soon after that and Oraya excused herself from her friends. That is what these people were to her now, not just an assembly of allies, but friends. A family even, a family that she never had at the circle.

 

She found herself outside Arl Eamon’s estate walking up and down the streets of Denerim’s market district. After so many years of being locked away in the tower Oraya found that she loved being outside. Camping and traveling was something new and surprisingly something she found she enjoyed. She thought the crisp night air would clear her head, but it was no use.

 

She went back inside soon after and made her way strait to her room. She didn’t know what she would do if she saw Alistair now. She didn’t want to start crying again, not after she had composed herself with the help of her friends.

 

Once in her room she had tried to sleep but she found that she couldn’t and she also realized couldn’t leave either. So she stayed there locked in this limbo. Asking herself the same question over and over. _Did I do the right thing making him King._

Only finding a few hours of fitful sleep before dawn Oraya awoke and deeply regretted being unable to sleep longer. She felt drained and exhausted. Not a good frame of mind to march into battle.

And yet here she was awkwardly sitting astride a horse, in the lead of an army that she built on her way to Redcliff to kill the Arch Demon. And sitting beside her in a new set of gold plate was King Alistair of Ferelden. He was no longer hers, no longer her Grey Warden, her partner in this war. She had set them on different destinies with her decision at the Landsmeet. They hadn’t spoken and Oraya couldn’t tell if the tension she felt between them was real or was she just imagining it. She wanted to say something, to try to fix what was broken. Her knuckles were so white from how hard she was gripping the reigns to prevent taking hold of his hand. She needed his support here. They were walking into an oncoming storm, one that would surly tear them all apart.

 

But Oraya did none of that. She kept her eyes firmly fixed forward, and began fixing the walls around her heart that her ex-lover had so successfully demolished. As always she would be the only support she needed.

 

 

They had marched in the wrong direction. After a brief scuffle with only a portion of the darkspawn they had been told that the Hord was in fact marching on Denerim. The place they had just come from. Oraya felt like screaming. They were now back to where they had been the night before. Standing on the edge of a war that seemed just out of reach but much too close at the same time.

 

The rage and sadness were swirling around inside Oraya and were creating a storm of equal measure. Things were pressing in on her from all directions and she did not know what to do. It was moments like this that she remembered she was only 23 and had lived most of her life in the circle. She was a girl, a lost girl who was no leader of a Grey Warden army.

 

After snapping at Oghren for the third time that evening Oraya left the main hall of Redcliff and felt the eyes of her companions on the back of her neck. She had every intention of returning to her room until Riordan turned the corner.

 

“Ah Oraya, I was just coming to find you. Do you have a moment? There is something I must share with you.” Giving only a nod in agreement Oraya followed Riordan back to his room. As she walked into the room she saw Alistair sanding to three feet from the door. He was out of his armor, in only a loos shirt and soft brown pants. Seeing him there, vulnerable and beautiful was like a punch to the stomach. This was her Alistair, not the king, but the man she loved.

 

She wasn’t given any time to recover however because Riordan was speaking. “You are new to the Gray Wardens, and you may not have been told how an arch demon is slain. I need to know if that is so,” Oraya had to physically stop herself from looking over to Alistair when he replied.

 

“You mean there is more to it than just, say, chopping off its head?” Maker his voice was still like velvet and Oraya just wanted to listen to him talk forever. But she had to pay attention.

 

“So it is true,” the senior Grey Warden sighed and wrung his hands. “Duncan had not yet told you. I has simply assumed….”Riordan trailed off. Oraya’s focus was sharper now. She did not like the tone of his voice and knew that whatever he had to say neither she nor Alistair would like. “Tell me, have you ever wondered why the Grey Wardens are needed to defeat the darkspawn?”

 

Oraya raised her eyebrow, “I assume it has something to do with the taint in us?” There was deep magic that had taken place during her joining and she remembered it coursing through her when her lips touched the darkspawn blood. It must be what lets them kill the arch demon.

 

Riordan smiled ever so slightly. “That is exactly what it involves.” The older warden turned to look out the window of his room and took a deep breath before continuing. “The archdemon may be slain as any other darkspawn, but should any other than a Grey Warden do the slaying, it will not be enough.” He paused and looked back at them both. “The essence of the beast will pass through the taint to the nearest darkspawn and will be reborn anew in that body. The dragon is thus all but immortal. But if the archdemon is slain by a Grey Warden…” This pause here was more pregnant and the hairs on the back of Oraya’s neck stood up.

 

“It’s essence travels into the Grey Warden instead.”

 

The silence that greeted this was profound. Dread pooled in Oraya’s stomach and she forced herself to speak. “And….and what happens to the Grey Warden?” She was certain she already knew the answer. Riordan held her gaze as he answered.

 

“A darkspawn is an empty, soulless vessel, but a Grey Warden is not. The essence of the archdemon is destroyed...and so is the Grey Warden.” Oray hung her head at this. Of course. It was the only thing that made sense.

 

“Meaning…” came Alistairs voice from beside her. “The Grey Warden who kills the archdemon….dies?”

 

“Yes,” the older Warden replied. “Without the archdemon, the Blight ends. It is the only way.”

 

Oraya squeezed her eyes shut and took a deep breath then looked back up at the only other Grey Wardens in Ferelden. “So it’s up to the three of us to kill this thing.”

 

“In Blights past, when the time came the eldest of the Grey Wardens would decide which amongst them would take that final blow,” Riordan explained. “If possible, the final blow should be mine to make. I am the eldest,” he said firmly. “The taint will not spare me much longer.” Oraya felt a deep sadness at that statement. It was a heavy price they had to pay and it kept getting heavier. “But if I fail the deed falls on you. The Blight must be stopped now or it will destroy all of Ferelden before the rest of the Grey Wardens can assemble. Remember that.”

 

Oraya felt her mouth grow dry and her head spin. When Riordan said ‘you’ he had meant them both. She and Alistair, but that is not what Oraya heard. She had made Alistair king because she thought he would be the best for Ferelden and she still believed that. She would not let him kill the archdemon if Riordan died. She would do it. Just because Alistair did not love her, did not mean she didn’t love him. She would protect him no matter what.

 

“But enough,” Riordan said, trying to lighten the mood. “There will be much to do tomorrow and little enough time to rest before it. I will let you return to your rooms.”

 

Oraya quickly moved towards the door, a steely calm had taken root in her. The storm that had been raging inside her earlier was dying out, turning into a fire with a single purpose. She was just about out the door when Alistair spoke again.

 

“I will see you once the army is ready to march, then. I guess this ends soon, one way or another.”

 

Riordan nodded sadly. “That it does, my friend, that it does.”

 

           

Morrigan stood at the end of the hallway and watched Oraya all but flee from the Grey Warden’s room. In a flash the other woman was across the hall and into her room, the door closing with a firm snap. Alistair followed behind slowly and stood staring at the closed door sadly. Even from her position Morrigan glared at the man though she knew he wouldn’t see. He was an idiot, leaving Oraya the day before they were supposed to fight the darkspawn hoard, all because he was named king and had a ‘duty’ to uphold. As she has always insisted Alistair was an imbecile.

 

            There was only one reason that the both of them had been spoken to by the older Grey Warden. They had been told the true reason the Wardens were the only ones who could end the Blight. It was time to share her part of the plan, but she could not proceed as originally intended.

 

            She had wanted to speak to Oraya first, she would surely be the more reasonable than her oaf of a lover. But now…She did not feel like it would be the best course of action. She also did not like the idea of forcing the other woman, who she knew was broken hearted, to confront the man who hurt her and beg for her life.

 

            So she waited for Alistair to walk past her in the hall. “I need to speak with you,” she said curtly and then proceeded strait towards the room he had been given.

            “What?” She heard him exclaim. “Morrigan I really don’t want to talk. Especially about Or-“

 

            They had reached his room when Morrigan had turned around and glared at him. “Be silent and listen,” she hissed. “I do not like you Alistair. I never have. You are immature, annoying, and naive. I do not understand why Oraya fell in love with you and named you king, with Anora being a much better choice but she must have seen something in you. Ti’s a mystery but there you have it.” She saw Alistair was ready to say something in rebuttal but she cut him off again.

 

            “I also know that while you threw that love in the mud, she will still do everything in her power to save you. If Riordan dies, and even if he does not, it will be Oraya who will kill the archdemon.”

 

            Alistair shook his head, looking distressed. “No, no she has a one in three chance.”

 

            Morrigan laughed without humor. “She has nothing to live for anymore you idiot! She was a mage from the circle who had nothing. You gave her something and she returned her heart to you and you broke it all because of a misplaced sense of duty. She has nothing left and she is willing to die!” Her voice grew in volume until she was practically yelling at the man. Morrigan took satisfaction in the shocked expression on Alistair’s face. She took a deep breath before she continued.

 

            “I do not wish to see my best friend, my only friend, die. And neither do the rest of our company,” Alistair looked lost and desperate and Morrigan realized she had him. Alistair loved Oraya. Like the elf, he would do anything for his lover. “I have a solution, if you wish to hear it. You will not like it and frankly neither will I, but it will save her life.”

 

            The room fell silent as the proposition was left out there in the air between them. She watched as Alistair looked around the room, as if he were trying to pull another solution out from the cracks in the walls. Finally he sighed and looked at Morrigan. “Alright,” he said. “Tell me what I have to do.”


	2. A Final Decision

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here is the next part. A little shorter this time and you'll see why.

           They rode back to Denrim as hard as the army would let them. By the time they got to the outskirts of the city Oraya was stiff and sore having never ridden this much in her life. She gave a brief speech when the army of Elves, Dwarves and Men formed up in front of the gates. She then dismounted her horse; she fought better on the ground, slipped her staff off her back she cast a ward on each of her friends. With Spellweaver strapped to her side she was as ready for battle as she was ever going to be. She gave the word and her army broke through the main gait.

 

            It seemed like it took forever for the forces to clear out the main part of the city. Oraya threw every spell she knew at the darkspawn, dashing around the battlefield to make sure her companions were still alright, that they were alive. She was splattered in blood by the time the last of the darkspawn fell. During the respite Riordan found her and told her of the plan. He was to head to Fort Drakon to lure the archdemon to him. Oraya and the other were to dispatch the archdemon’s generals then to meet him at Fort Drakon. He suggested a group no larger than four.

 

            Once he was gone Oraya walked over to her friends, who were gathered off to the side of the main army. “Well, this is it friends,” she said with a smile that she hoped seemed genuine. “This is what we have been working towards and I am so glad that I met all of you.” She started at one end of the line where Wynne was standing.

 

            The older mage looked at her and gave her a sad smile. “So this is it then. All we’ve been through has led up to this. Whatever happens now… to either of us, know that I am proud—infinitely proud—to have called you friend.” Oraya rushed forward and gave Wynne a hug. “Farewell,” the older mage said into her hair. “May the Maker watch over you.” She pulled away from the older mage.

 

            Standing next to Wynne was Oghren. “It’s been an honour to fight with you Oghren,” she said sincerely. While the dwarf may have been gruff and rude and obnoxious he was still a skilled warrior.

 

            “Honour?” Oghren laughed. “Nobody’s looked at me and seen honour in a long time, Warden. You took in a drunken disgrace of an Orzammar warrior. You gave me a reason to fight and the will to keep going.” Oraya was about to stop the dwarf, she didn’t need to hear all this but Oghren seemed like he needed to get it off his chest so she stayed silent. “You helped me find the one woman in the sodding world who might put up with me, and you helped me get past Branka so I could have someone new. I owe you a lot, Oraya. I conceder it a fine honour to die for you and your cause.”

            The smile that split her face now was actually genuine. “The honour is mine, my friend.”

            “Then it’s sodding honour for everyone. That’s war for you. Let the stone turn red from the blood of heroes. Today I will be the warrior you taught me to be.” With that Oghren stepped away and went to talk to some of the dwarves from Ozzammar.

 

            Sten was next and as she stepped up to him he asked her “Are you ready? We have reached the battlefield at last.”

Oraya extended her hand to the Qunari, “Thank you for your help Sten.” The Qunari looked at her hand but took it gently, just has she had taught him.

           “I have done nothing,” he replied as he shook her hand. “You have carried us this far. Do not doubt that.” And he had nothing else to say, and she had to thank him for that. Sten was always to the point and she needed that in this very moment.

 

             It was Leliana who she came to next. The young woman was staring off into the city, looking at what, Oraya could not tell. “So this is it,” she said in the same tone that she had told Oraya about her dream, all those month ago. “This is the end. We’ve come so far. It is strange knowing that all our fates will be decided in a matter of hours. We stand on the precipice, before the greatest battle of our age…I wonder if the heroes of old ever felt like this.” Oraya smiled at that, Leliana was speaking as if she were telling one of her stories.

 

               “I am not afraid,” her friend said with conviction. “We go to fight for a good cause and there is nowhere else I would rather be. You are a dear, dear friend, and I will stand with you to whatever end.” Oraya gave Leliana a smile and like Wynne embraced her friend. “This day, we will forge a legend of our own.” Oraya broke the embrace and saw Zevran standing just to her side.

 

                “Heading off to slay the dragons without, hum?” he questioned. Oraya was about to reply when Zevran shook his head. “It’s fine, fine. Say hello to the Archdemon for me. He never writes anymore. It’s rather distressing. And…” the hesitation caught Oraya’s attention. “Do watch your back. No getting eaten. Unless you think it’s really important of course.” Then he was gone too, to stand with Eamon’s men.

                As if she had been invisible Morrigan appeared by her side in an instant. “Once this is done, no matter how it turns out I will be gone. You are aware of this yes?”

                Oraya nodded solemnly. “I still don’t understand why, but let me say thank you for all you’ve done.” Turning to look at the dark haired woman she inclined her head to her friend.

                “Allow me to say only one thing before we go.” Morrigan said and took hold of Oraya’s hands. “I knew nothing of friendship before we met. And I will always consider you such. Live well, my friend. Live gloriously.” Oraya felt her heart give a tight squeeze. Morrigan was her best friend. She had taught her so much about what it meant to be a mage. She made her not feel afraid of her powers. “Now let us see this finally done. The Archdemon awaits,” and Morrigan walked off towards Sten.

                 Saying goodbye to her friends was much harder than Oraya would have guessed. She was close to tears and knew that there would be no way she would be able to hold it together much longer. And of course that was the moment when Alistair walked over from where he had been speaking with Bhan Tegan. She looked at his face, his beautiful face and her resolve almost cracked. But no, she had made her decision, just like he had when he left her.

               “Alright team!” She called out, surprised that her voice didn’t crack. “Morrigan, Sten and Leliana, you will be coming with me to meet Riordan at the tower.” She was going to continue when Alistair interrupted her.  


                “What about me! I should be there with you. I am a Grey Warden.” It was in this moment that Oraya understood what Morriagn said. He sounded like a child.

 

                  Oraya rounded on him and stared him down. “You are a King now before you are a Grey Warden. I did not give everything to put you on the throne only to have you throw it away. You will stay here and lead the army in clearing out the city. Do you hear me?” She realized that it might not be the best note to leave, well whatever she could call their involvement, on. But she couldn’t say anything else without breaking down into tears. “Everyone else will stay with the King and help him clear the city. Understood.” Everyone else nodded and Oraya returned the gesture.

                  “Alright let us not keep the Archdemon waiting.” A cheer went up from the gathered armies and Oraya started on her way deeper into the city. What surprised her was Alistair came up beside her.

                  “Oraya wait a moment I need to tell you something.”

                  Without even stopping Oraya shook her head. “Goodbye Alistair. I believe you will be a good king. Do not make that belief into a lie. Rule and be great. I know you will do your duty honorably.” Without waiting for a reply she turned to Sten who was only a foot from her. “Which general shall we take down first?”

 

* * *

 

                  How they made it up to the top of Fort Drakon Oraya did not know. The spells she sent flying at the darkspawn burned them and froze them into place but it seemed like there was no end to them. Finally they had burst through the doors to the top of the Fort and had come face to face with the Archdemon. The large purple dragon was a ghastly sight and the purple fire it breathed looked more dangerous than the flames from the High Dragon in Haven.

 

                  The battle was fierce. Especially after the Archdemon called on the aid of the hord. Even with her shields up Oraya was bleeding from a number of deep gashes created by the blade of the darkspawn. It was when she saw both Morrigan and Leliana fall under the claws of a Shrik that she snapped. Focusing all her might and mana she had left Oraya pulled together a spell that she, Morrigan, and Wynne had been working on. Out of the end of her staff erupted an ice storm like no other. It caught all those around her in a blizzard, including the Archdemon.

 

                   She saw on her other side Sten rush to one of the Balistas and she tried to keep the spell active as long as she was able, her energy and mana were running dangerously low. Morrigan had generated an arcane shield between the darkspawn, Leliana and herself. Whatever Sten planned on doing he had to do it fast. The _thunk_ of the Ballista made Oraya’s hopes a reality as she watched as the heavy bolt fly through the air and with a sickening sound lodged it’s self in the leg of the Archdemon.

                   This was her moment. Releasing the spell Oraya pulled spellweaver form it’s sheath and ran full speed towards the distracted archdemon. It was a good thing that Alistair and Sten had been teaching her to wield a sword. As the head of the beast swung back around in furry Oraya raised the enchanted blade and sunk it deep into the creatures skin. All she had to do was brace herself against the force and the Archdemon slit it’s own throat. A scream so terrible ripped from the beast and it’s head fell to the ground.

 

                     Time seemed to stop as she gazed down at the twisted creature. This was it. This was the moment she would fulfill her duty as a Grey Warden, she was going to kill this thing and save everyone. The faces of her friends flashed through her mind and she smiled slightly. She loved them. They gave her a life in the short time she had known them. It was Alistair’s face that she saw last, his beautiful face, with his soft freckles and kind eyes. She remembered the feel of his lips the first time they had kissed. And with that thought that she fixed firmly in her mind as she thrust her sword into the Archdemons skull.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And my heart continues to break. Come send me love on tumblr. light-and-dark-inside-of-us.tumblr.com


	3. Waking to a Dream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I hope you guys didn't think I would leave you hanging there did you? I am the biggest softie and there is no way I could kill any of my characters.

                The strangest thing was that she woke up. She was not supposed to wake up. Riordan had made that very clear. And yet here she was lying in a soft bed with a warm blanket pulled up over her arms. Oraya opened her eyes. Sitting at the end of the bed reading was Wynne. “Did we win?” she asked with a horse voice that caused the older mage’s head snapped up.

 

              “Thank the Maker you are awake! We were all so worried. After you killed the archdemon Lilianna said you were thrown clear across the tower,” Wynne said as she stood up and came to stand beside the bed. Oraya pushed herself in the sitting position as those words sunk in.

 

             “So the archdemon is dead?” she breathed. The memory of slitting the creature’s throat was clear and so was the one of her delivering the final blow. “But why am I still alive?” She looked up at Wynne to see the older woman was smiling.

 

             “I thought you would be asking that. I am not sure but Morrigan gave this to me before she left,” from one of the pockets of her robe Wynne pulled out a sealed envelope. “She said that this would explain things.” Oraya took the letter and bit her lip. On one side was her name. She turned the letter over. Black wax sealed it. She cracked the wax and read the last words Morrigan had left her with.

 

_Oraya,_

_If you are reading this I am glad. It means that you survived. I know you have questions and I will try to answer them. I had a way to save you, tis the reason Flemeth sent me with you. I performed a ritual that would prevent the soul of the archdemon from taking possession of the Grey Warden who killed it. I knew that Grey Warden was to be you, and I found myself unwilling to let you die. I will not go into detail in regard to what the ritual entailed, as it is one of the reason’s I left, that and I would not like to be subject to your wrath when you found out it was Alistair who agreed to help. All you need to know is that it is in the past and that he saved your life._

_Our paths will not cross again my friend, but I do wish you luck. Go live a life, one that is entitled to the Hero of Ferelden._

_You are the best of us and you made us great. You deserve everything._

_Your friend always,_

_Morrigan._

             Oraya felt tears well up in her eyes. Morrigan had saved her. While she knew that she had gained the witches friendship she did not realize the bond ran this deep. She owed the woman everything. It was the second part of the letter that had her heart beating twice as fast. Looking up at Wynne with desperation in her eyes Oraya threw the covers back. “Wynne, where is Alistair?”

 

              The other mage looked confused and made to keep Oraya from getting out of bed. “The boy is busy, he has a lot he must do in order to rebuild. Now that the Blight is over our new King will be kept busy.” Relief flooded her veins like a warm bath washing away the chill from the cold of the Tower. He was alive. Whatever spell Morrigan had cast did not cost his life. She sagged back against the bed and Wynne tisked.

 

              “You must rest. I am doing all I can to ease your wounds but there is a limit to my power.” She pulled the blanket back over Oraya. She then made to leave the room, “I will inform the rest of our party that you are awake. They have been very worried. Lilianna especially.”

 

            “Wynne,” Oraya said as the older woman reached the door.

 

             Wynne turned around at the sound of her name. “I am glad you are alive,” Oraya said smiling at the woman who was the closest thing that she had to a mother.

 

            “And I you child, and I you.”

* * *

             The next day was for celebrations. While Oraya was still battered and bruised she was able to stand, and apparently that meant that it was time to greet the people she had saved.

 

            Alistair gave a speech in the main hall of the Palace thanking her as well as the whole of Ferelden for what they did to save their homeland. What surprised her the most however was he could grant Oraya a boon for her saving Ferelden.

 

             Oraya had to almost bite her tounge off in order to stop herself from saying the first thing that came to her mind. All she wanted was standing before her. She wanted to ask the King to giver her back _her_ Alistair. The man who blushed so red when she asked him back to her tent, the man who stopped to pick a rose because it reminded him of her. But she could not. Alistair had made it clear that his duty came before her and she would have to live with that.

 

            So she stood there, ever so slowly rebuilding the walls he had broken, looked him strait in the eye and all but demanded the independence of Ferelden mages. She could see the surprise on his face, but it was only there for a moment. He agreed to her request and then addressed the assembled lords once again. The King told her that it was time for the people to see her, before they broke down the door and she went. She walked away from him and didn’t look back.

 

            The rest of the night was spent at a table with her companions, a never-ending string of ale, and pure joy that they had all made it. It was hard to believe and Oraya was ready for it all to disappear.

 

             Alistair and Morrigan were the only glaring absences. Alistair had Arls to impress and plans to make. And while she would have loved nothing more than to have Alistair there, red faced and cheery from ale she told it was for the best. If he was here it would take the joy out of the moment.

 

              The party was in full swing until well past midnight but Oraya found she was tiring rather quickly. She was not fully recovered and sleep sounded like the best plan. Bidding goodnight to her friends she slipped across the grand hall to the door that would lead to her room. She was not stopped by anyone and she sent up a silent thank you to the Maker. As she was about to slip through the door she caught sight of Alistair. He as in the middle of the hall, surrounded by a number of people who seemed to be talking to him. But he was not paying them any attention.

 

                He was looking at her. Oraya got the feeling that he had been watching her from the moment that she had gotten up from her seat beside Sten. She held his eyes for a moment. He had saved her life, just as she had saved his and now they were even. Oraya inclined her head to show him that she had seen him and left the Hall.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter felt kinda short but I felt like if I was to continue the chapter would be way too long. The next chapter is in the works so keep an eye out. 
> 
> Also come talk to me on tumblr! http://light-and-dark-inside-of-us.tumblr.com/

**Author's Note:**

> This hurts my heart. Next part should come soon. Also come talk to me about Dragon Age and other stuff on tumblr http://light-and-dark-inside-of-us.tumblr.com/


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